Love in silence

/September 2021

When I quarreled with the children when I was young, I didn't talk, but when I grew up, I did the same thing: when I fell in love, I didn't speak, put a note in a book, put it in his hand and left. Now I don't listen to each other's phones and go home to watch their TV. 

Love this thing, the feeling is good because there is a common language, bad because there is no "common language". 

"Common language" has rich connotations, but no matter how it is interpreted, the shallowest understanding is that it is dangerous for two people to have nothing to say, which is the highest warning about love. 

However, most people's marriages will inevitably go to a situation where there is nothing to say. 

That's what happens in our family. 

Two people at home in the evening seem to be speechless all night, there is nothing to say at dinner, each read their books after dinner, to facilitate everyone to read their own, there are desk lamps and floor lamps everywhere. 

Sometimes two people surf the Internet, very late, two people will meet on the Internet, a look at the online friends, only this man around. 

Sometimes, he even left a message on my blog and the common comfort such as taking a step back followed by my occasional essay on how I felt about it. 

When they took a ride to work early the next morning, the two were still speechless all the way, and occasionally a person jumped out of the green belt. I shouted to be careful, he said. I saw it. 

And then there was nothing to say all the way. 

Because I didn't speak, sometimes I leaned my head against the back of the backrest and wanted to sleep for a while, so he immediately adjusted the back of my chair five degrees, saying, "you go to sleep." 

If he doesn't sleep and has nothing to say, he plays music, not all the discs I like to listen to, but when I'm in the car, he plays what I like to listen to. 

If I say, listen to this again, he will simply play it in a loop. 

But none of us answered the phone and thought it was family time in the car. 

Sometimes I notice the silence. My husband has always been a quiet person, so I always pay attention to it. 

I am worried that this is a matter of marriage, so I just say a few words at leisure. Sometimes I worry so strongly that I even question him with a strong attitude. Why don't you always say anything? 

The implication is that he is not responsible for the quality of the marriage. 

And he said, there is nothing to say. 

And then say a few words leisurely. 

Most of the time, we don't notice the silence. 

I used to be sensitive to silence, but now I don't. 

In the past, the interpretation of silence was too complicated. not saying a word when two people ate together did not mean that they were not interested in household chores and deleted immediately after receiving a text message. it did not mean that they could not share their secrets and that they wanted to read the newspaper before going to bed. doesn't mean you hate each other's bodies. 

Being quiet doesn't mean you're emotionally insecure. 

Even though I was speechless all the way, I was more or less reluctant to leave the car when I parked downstairs. I always wanted to stay in the car and listen to music, and my husband always said that it would be refreshing to eat plum before leaving. 

Before going to bed at night, both of them will wonder how time passes so quickly, so they always find ways to kill time, such as pouring out the stewed soup in the pot and drinking a bowl by one person. 

Perhaps, when two people get along, they will certainly change from simplicity to complexity, and then slowly from simplicity to simplicity. If this is the case, a quiet marriage is not terrible. If you do not speak, you can also fall in love.

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