Marriage and holding hands

/September 2021

There are a couple upstairs in my house. Every time I meet them, I always see them holding hands and talking and laughing. That kind of intimacy and sweetness makes me unforgettable. What is even rarer is that they are not just pretending, but after years of marriage, they can still hold each other's hands and walk in the secular fireworks in ordinary trivial days, happy and calm. 

As a neighbor for more than ten years, I have a kind of respect for their love and envy. Holding hands is nothing for young people in love, but it is not easy to keep this intimate action as always for several years and more than ten years after entering the marriage castle. If two people didn't have deep affection and mutual appreciation for each other, I think this detail has already been lost to a chicken feather in married life.  

When I mentioned this to my husband, I also expressed my envy. He looked puzzled and then said with a smile, "I'm married. Why do you envy this?" Living well is better than nothing. " I inclined his one eye, no longer words. The husband was a soldier and then transferred to local work. He is a man of strong principle, he is very selfless in his work, and his usual life has no intersection with romance.  

We entered the marriage siege in the age of advocating personality and professional ideals. A bunch of flowers, a rental house, holding hands to meet the bride and marry in the blessings of relatives and friends. In the days that followed, two people freed up their hands, worked hard, earned money to support their families, took care of elderly parents, raised young children, did endless housework, and did endless things ... Our hearts were filled with the five flavors of work and life all day long, and our hands were busy with daily rice, oil, and salt. In the passing years, we completely forgot to leave some free time, to hold each other's hands, and then to feel and pass on each other's temperature.  

It wasn't until my daughter graduated from college and went to the south, and her in-laws died one after another, leaving only the two of us at home, that I suddenly felt empty-handed, except for the calluses accumulated in my palm.  

Last winter, there was no snow, it was dry and cold. What makes my heart colder is the uninvited disease, and it's the kind of disease that grinds to death. I have to be admitted to the hospital and undergo various examinations, expecting the doctor to rejuvenate my eyes and give me a bright world.  

Only when your eyes are dark, are you more eager for the arrival of light? I can't see the color of the world, and I grope forward carefully. My heart is full of fear and despair! Fortunately, there was a hand holding me, being my eye, and guiding me. This is the second hand in hand after our marriage for more than 20 years. There is no initial heartbeat acceleration, nor the romantic sweetness of that year. There is only a sureness from the bottom of my heart, which makes me no longer afraid of darkness and loneliness! 

After the operation, I entered the stage of recuperation. In the meantime, my husband will accompany me on my way to the provincial capital for a follow-up visit from time to time. Every time he goes back and forth, he will hold my hand, lest I accidentally fall and cause the retina to fall off again. I'm not so weak and sentimental, I just enjoy being led by him. Perhaps women are naturally fond of being cared for and loved, regardless of their age. Every time he walks through the intersection holding hands, walks down the steps, and is protected on his right side, a warm current always flows from winter to early spring, warming the long season. Sometimes I even think, my eyes don't have to get better so fast so that I can be led by him all the time. It would be nice if we could walk hand in hand in a quiet time and grow old together. 

With my husband's careful care, my eye disease gradually recovered, and the bright world did not abandon me after all. It's getting warmer. We often take a walk together after supper. My husband usually walks like the wind, perhaps because after half a year's running-in, he is used to slowing down and waiting for me. 

One evening, we took a walk in the park. I saw an old couple in their seventies and eighties sitting quietly on a bench in the center of the park. Two people who also don't talk, like sculptures, waiting for the sunset in the afterglow of the sunset. This picture is a bit bleak. I was about to sigh, but I found that the old couple's hands were clasping each other! Hold your hand and grow old with your son. I don't need to know their stories. This clasped hand alone is enough to make my eyes moist and my heart warm.

If life is adrift, with your company, you can finally reach the other side; No matter how dangerous the journey is, I am afraid of darkness when you hold my hand! After years of baptism in marriage, we don't have to say "I love you" deliberately. As long as you take my hand and walk slowly, our love will spread and diffuse in the palm temperature.

My husband looked in the direction of my eyes, and looked back at my envy and emotion, and seemed to understand my thoughts. He held out his hand, took me, and walked into the spring breeze ...

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