Wash the dust of marriage

/October 2021

Marriage, like our bodies, will lose its luster over time, and it will also accumulate some toxins of complaint, disappointment, sadness, contradiction, and resentment, which darkens the marriage. 

If we can learn to remove the toxins from marriage in a smart way, our marriage will shine again. 

Transfer bad mood properly. 

After he resigned and started his business, when he returned home, he either lectured his subordinates on the phone or spread out the papers on the coffee table in the living room. I could understand him, but the family atmosphere was always messed up in his shouting. Let my mood rise and fall. 

I went to his office to have lunch with him and advised him to take care of his work before going home. I promised that my son and I would greet him with joy when he got home. 

I slowly helped him complete the transformation of his work and family roles, and there was a happy atmosphere at home. 

Don't be swayed by each other's bad mood, but try to find a way to find the source of the bad mood and learn to transfer it properly. 

I know you work so hard every day for your family, but it would be better if you could pay attention to the way. " 

Think about him from the other person's point of view, and he is usually happy to accept your advice. 

Happiness is not alone. 

Every time he asked his friends to come to the house for a party, I would prepare snacks, beer, and snacks for them. 

Therefore, my husband is very proud in front of his friends. 

The problem is, I don't like such a lively party. I hope he can spend some time together. The unhappiness accumulated in my heart always makes me angry inexplicably. I know he will read my online diary. I turn my heart into gentle and sentimental words. 

I did it. 

We now have two ways of life. I occasionally accompany him to a friend's party, and he will watch a literary movie with me. 

A good marriage should be a state of comfort for each other. 

Have the courage to express your thoughts so that the other person can understand what you are suffering and don't use a way that strongly opposes the other person's habits, which will only be counterproductive. 

Do not use angry methods to protect their interests, to find a suitable solution for both sides, is the effective solution. 

Interesting question. Excellent answer. 

He belongs to a person who doesn't talk much, and our communication is often a few minutes at the dinner table, but I always say that when he listens and asks for his opinion, he always looks like you're in charge. 

I have no idea what he's thinking, which scares me. 

In marriage, it's like I'm fighting alone. 

I set out a clear outline of the question and sent it to his mailbox and asked him to answer me like an interviewee. 

The more interesting my question became, the better his answer was. 

Although this stupid method seems superfluous, in fact, through a question and answer, I know more about him and greatly reduce my panic. 

Throw the answer to him, encourage his laziness, throw the question to him is the best way to get him involved. 

Communication doesn't have to be a quick conversation. An email or a text message can get you the results you want. 

To open his chatterbox, first find the topic he is interested in, even if it doesn't match what you have to say. 

He likes to tell me what to do with a low-key nagging man. When I'm cooking, he will stand by and tell me what to put in salt first and what to put in salt when it comes out of the pot, which often makes me angry. 

A man who can't stop nagging makes it impossible for people to stay at home. 

He is good in other aspects, but he likes to control me with words too much. 

When he started "positive" guidance again, I looked at him with a smile and did it the way he suggested, but it didn't all work. 

I was relieved that he finally shut up in front of the facts. at the very least, I could happily have my own cook's time in the kitchen. 

Don't argue with him on a high profile, or you will be entangled in more endless meaningless nagging and eventually turn into a quarrel. 

Be his mirror and occasionally follow his example to deal with him. 

You can do it. More than 90% of your suggestions and opinions are effective. 

It is only when you are responsible that you take responsibility. 

Every time something unpleasant happens, her first sentence is "it's all your fault". 

I remember once when we went shopping together, she accidentally lost her wallet and her bank card was swiped with 5000 yuan. 

She cried and complained that I didn't stare at her bag. 

I didn't argue too much with her to comfort her at that time. 

I began to deliberately put her in charge of some things at home, ranging from paying water and electricity bills to letting her pick out furniture on her own. 

When she made a mistake, I never blamed her but worked with her to find a way to fix it. 

I hope she can understand that in marriage, a sense of responsibility is a kind of loving responsibility. 

Stick to the things assigned to her to the end, otherwise, you will not only waste all your previous efforts but also encourage her dependence. 

Timely encourage her progress, and then gradually increase the difficulty. 

Love each other's family. 

He doesn't like to go back to his mother's house with me because my mother keeps the house too clean and he is not used to being in that environment. 

Since he thought my house was too clean, I ruined his house, too. 

In the stalemate, we seldom go back to our parents' house together. 

Later, I learned that he was so unreasonable for a reason: when my mother-in-law came to our new house, I casually laughed that her shoes were too old and didn't match the new home, which made my husband bear a grudge. 

When my mother-in-law came to the house again, I sincerely apologized to my mother-in-law. 

My frankness also untied my husband's heart, and he was finally willing to go back to his mother's house with me. 

When you realize your mistake, apologize in time, and show sincerity is more important than sophistry. 

Do not care about some innocuous little things, there is tolerance to see love.

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