What is marriage

/October 2021

When the plane put up the landing gear, the fuselage shook and I leaned sharply to the right. 

"never mind, just for a moment." 

One hand gently but forcefully took hold of my arm. 

The voice came from a white-haired old woman around me. 

She looked very capable in a gray cashmere sweater and woolen trousers, her white hair was curly, and her gray eyes were not clouded with age. 

These eyes made me think she was from Germany or somewhere in France. 

"your Beijing dialect is very similar to that spoken by my grandmother. Not many people talk like that now." 

I said tentatively. 

A kind of peace welled up on the old man's face: "this is the Chinese accent I began to learn when I was 20 years old. In 1936, I had not yet begun to resist Japan." 

I quickly worked out the age of the old man-80. 

But she doesn't look like an 80-year-old woman. 

As the plane climbed slowly, the old man whispered his story to himself. 

Her hometown is in Frankfurt, Germany, and her father is an architecture professor. 

At that time, my father had a student, a handsome young man from Hubei, who spoke fluent German and often appeared in her living room, occasionally peeking at her during discussions with her father, when she was 17 years old. 

Two years later, the 25-year-old Hubei boy left a letter before returning home. In addition to a thank-you note written in German, there was also an address card in both Chinese and German: Wuhan, China. 

She only used this address once to send him a short telegram: "if you get married in Wuhan in the future, please wait." 

The couple has been living in China since their marriage, and she settled in Beijing after her husband died in 1966. 

Sixty years have made her completely Sinicized. She wears Lenin clothes, holds a red treasure book, has a one-page household registration card for everyone in China, and has used food stamps, cloth tickets, and meat stamps. 

She speaks authentic old Beijing dialect, and she jokes that it is called "marrying a chicken with a chicken". 

In her view, her husband's home is her home, so she goes back to Wuhan once a year. 

From her story, I quickly calculated number-30 years, a German woman widowed a Chinese architect for 30 years. 

I can't imagine whether the old or the old will have a similar peace in the face of the lost romance, the changes of the times, the departure of their loved ones, and the end of their lives. 

Just as I can't imagine how painful it was when her husband, like many Chinese intellectuals who could not bear the insult at that time, ended his life together with the promise of their marriage. 

There was no sadness in the old man's story, and she was almost completely immersed in the sweetness of the young couple. 

The plane began to land. 

"May I know how to find you in Beijing?" 

I asked carefully. 

"I will return to Beijing five days later. If we are predestined, we can run into each other again." 

She said with a smile. 

When I found a hotel in downtown Wuhan, the first thing I did was book a flight back to Beijing five days later, just to be reunited with her. 

Because of this old man, I began to be homesick and miss my husband, who will leave home for a business trip when I return to Beijing. 

I have been used to being separated from my husband since the day I became a journalist. 

He stayed in a fixed place called "home" like a lamp, while I flew about like a bird. 

When I dialed the number at home, it was my husband's voice: "I knew it was you." 

So I told him about the old woman, and my husband listened quietly, just as I talked to him every night with tea, and he was silent to me. 

"I know you appreciate me." 

Thousands of miles apart, I suddenly have the impulse to express, and this is what I would not do on weekdays. 

The husband was smiling, but his words were still indifferent: "I'm doing laundry, bedspreads, and curtains. If you think about it, what else can a man whose wife has gone on a business trip to do but kill time like this?" 

This is my husband's usual expression, and it seems that I can only feel the meaning under the night sky in a different place. 

Five days passed quickly, and on the last morning, before I left Wuhan, I went to buy a sweater for my husband. 

This is the only time I have brought a present home. 

I arrived at the airport an hour and a half early and wandered around the place where I changed my boarding pass, waiting for the unforgettable old woman. 

When the gray figure appeared in my line of sight, we looked at each other and smiled. 

The old man took my hand and said, "Little girl, fate has made you create it deliberately." 

The trip to Wuhan made her very happy. 

"do you have a boyfriend to pick you up when you get off the plane?" 

I shook my head. "my husband is on a flight this afternoon, on a business trip." 

The old man smiled and narrowed his eyes into a crack: "gather less and leave more, and we did the same at that time." 

Your husband must not want you to go on a business trip. " 

I nodded, unable to speak, and suddenly wanted to cry. 

"because of the separation, it is very precious to be together." 

The old man patted my hand. "We have been together for 30 years, and then I have 30 years to remember." 

You've been away from home for five days, and you have four nights for lovesickness. It's very fulfilling, isn't it? " 

My tears fell and hit her on the back of her hand. 

We are still saying goodbye at the airport. 

Before she got into the taxi, she asked me seriously, "Little girl, do you know what marriage is?" 

I was speechless for a moment. 

The old man smiled: "Marriage is to give stability to the one you love and keep romance in your heart." 

When I got home, I saw a note from my husband: "I will hurry back at the speed of the sixth generation of Contra." 

The tablecloths, bedspreads, and curtains were all newly changed, and there was a faint smell of ginger in the room. 

I sat on the floor with the soft new sweater in my arms, sticking it to my face, thinking about what the old man said-marriage is about giving stability to the one you love and keeping the romance in your heart.

Dreamy modest formal dresses at great prices. We have it all – a perfect choice for the most formal and casually informal occasions.